My mad existence.

There has GOT to be something I have to get done.

Of course there is. I'm just really excellent at tricking myself into thinking that there's nothing.

An interesting dieting technique for college students is living at the top of an abysmal hill. I'm starving right now. There is nothing to eat in my dorm except for dry plain cereal, Cheez Its, Ritz crackers, and Saltines. Since I also have nothing to drink, eating any of the above would probably just worsen my situation. So I'm just wasting away due to complete laziness and lack of desire to walk back up the hill. 

This is probably a very similar situation to the one that made the dodos extinct.

I think that if I had to pick one TV station to survive on, it'd be TBS.

Uh oh. Joey's having college troubles. Good thing Worthington U has the perfect programs for her, oodles of financial aid, a prime locale, and lovely dorms that feature stained glass windows and hardwood floors.

POOF! I DON'T WANNA WAIT...