Today at work I met Denise Richards. She had a serious cluster of BANGS and two apparantly interbred boys who had their very own checkbooks with which to pay for their Moshi pillows and Mike & Ikes. Each wrote their own check for $8.50. Separately. I don't know if any of you understand how tedious that is.
I also encountered a slightly off, elderly Puerto Rican woman who was shopping with several generations of her family. They purchased 20 of those grippy foam placemats at .15 cents a piece ("for the porch"), a sno-cone maker, and an electric pancake griddle. This wouldn't have been half as weird if the afore mentioned matriarch didn't have some sort of melt down/short circuit/stroke which caused her to toddle around in a circle and slur "Leeninsandschings" (translation: Linens N Things) repetedly for five minutes while her great granddaughter's infant son gnawed on the nickles his mother got back as change for her sno cone maker.
I really could not make this stuff up. Forgive me for sharing if you don't care, but I really just think I should have it on record for posterity and also just in case I ever need material for a book.
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