I should have known that God was out to spite me today when I was forced to suffer through a "freezing, maybe a couple of degrees over" shower this morning. It was numbing, to say the least.
I'm feeling a mess. Maybe I just drank too much white trash sparkling nail polish remover tonight.
One thing I know is that I always try to do the right thing, regardless of whether or not anyone necessarily deserves it. I'm also really tired of being a fallback. I'm tired of apologizing for no reason, and while I'll never get tired of caring, I am tired of caring without any appreciation. I've watched enough movies to know what I want, but I've also lived long enough to know that certain things may never happen. I may have little to no sense of reality, but at least I don't pretend I'm one way and act another.
I don't want to have invested all of this time only to lose everything, but really, it's out of my control.
The statehouse looked especially beautiful tonight.
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