If it tastes like butter, but it's not...it's Chiffon!

What a crazy couple of HOT days. Bring em on though, in about a month we'll all be cool in our heels and wishing for 96 degree weather with 68% humidity.

So yesterday, Natale, Lizzy, Sammo, and myself all congregated with two purposes for the day: To get some sun and swim, and to find and purchase 90's memorabilia, the top of this list being REEBOK PUMP UP SHOES, you all know what I mean, the sneakers with the little button on the tongue that you press, which obviously causes the wearer to run faster, and jump higher, all due to compressed air being filtered into the sneaker. You might say that finding something like this is impossible. How naive you are.

Of course we found exactly what we were looking for at the Salvation Army, complete with a neon yellow and blue color scheme. We were lucky we got there when we did, seeing as it was welfare check and foodstamp Thursday. If we had arrived minutes after we did, those sneakers would never have graced us with their existance.

We also found something free lying on the side of the road, begging to be hauled into Natale's Dodge Neon and taken to some deserving recipient. Who knew the distinct scent of garbage could linger in hard plastic? Bwahaa.

School's in a couple days...it doesn't seem real to me, it feels like we've got four weeks left to kill. But we don't. I'm just sad to see summer end, I think, because being a senior is going to kick some serious booty. Yee haw.

Thousands of Pet Rocks have been euthanized.

Oh. Man.

This evening was spent in the Leominster High School cafeteria recruiting young hopefuls to the oh-so-wonderful DRAMA CLUB! Despite the oven-like conditions we endured, the evening was amusing and relatively sucessful. The freshmen as a whole are definately shrinking. I'm convinced that its a generational flaw, like peanut allergies in today's 6 year olds. I don't remember knowing ANYONE that was allergic to peanuts as a kid, and I certainly remember the seniors when I was a freshman being a whole lot bigger. Maybe in this case it's the lack of peanut butter crackers the freshmen are missing out on as children because of their allergies that's causing the demise of their physical stature. Food for thought.

I Love the 70's is a true inspiration. The upcoming Danielle Randall Out of the Blue Extravaganza, I Love tbe 90's is in the making. Samm and I are researching, and if any of you would like to be interviewed on such things as Tamogotchis, Beanie Babies, or Hanson, please let me know, It's going to be good.

Also, if you or someone you know knows if there are sparknotes for Barnaby Rudge, I would love to obtain them somehow. Especially since school starts in a week and I still have, oh, 300 pages of White Jacket left to read. Stunning.

Of course I read Harry Potter and the Order of the Phoenix again, instead of White Jacket or Barnaby Rudge for that matter. I have my priorities.

Every Dawson has a Joey.

I'm just going to lay it out there. Dawson's Creek was and will always be a wonderful, wonderful show. It really makes me look at my life and think...where did I go wrong? Aren't I supposed to be sailing off into oblivion with my adorable boyfriend right about now? Because that's what Joey and Pacey did the summer before THEIR senior year. Oh well. I'm clausterphobic anyway.

So last night it was decided that Kristin, Tito, Natty, and Samm would congregate chez moi tres early so that they could complet their AP French Assignment, which would in turn motivate me to work on reading for APs Psych and Lit. 

Samm slept over last night, and of course we set the alarm for exactly 7:00 AM, the time everyone was expected (when I say early, I mean EARLY. See what I'm saying about the longest day of the summer?). So we wake up to the blasting overture of Brigadoon at this wee hour, and really, after starting the day with extremely loud, honking bagpipes, there is nowhere to go but up. And up we went. Ten hours later, all was completed and Natty, Samm and I ended the day with a few rounds of Call the Consumer Hotlines, which is always a treat.

Speaking of treats, do you know how wonderful it is to fluff out a feather bed before you sleep on it? It takes a lot of effort to do this, because obviously the term "light as a feather" does not apply to down mattress covers, but the results are phenomonal.

Last night we also watched Miss Teen USA, just to keep up with the insults. Quick verbal retalliation takes practice, and God knows if you need people to make fun of, Miss Teen USA is the thing to watch. My brother brought up an excellent point. When AC Slater stated that the contestants were not judged on their evening gown, but on their presentation, Ian determined that if this is the case, then any one of them could have worn a lobster costume and it wouldn't have made a difference. And it wouldn't have. The audience would have been too distracted by Miss Michigan's HUGE nostril (yes, only one, as they appeared to be fused together) to even notice a giant crustacean scampering about.

Drought.

I hate it when it's hot AND rainy. If it's going to be hot, give me some sun. Otherwise, just let the rain do it's thing and cool off the world.

I read in the newspaper today, and saw on the news last night that those animal activists are after Prince William for killing an antelope while on safari in Africa. First of all, if I were an antelope in Africa I would mount MYSELF over Prince William's fireplace. Honestly, eventually that antelope would have just been brutally ripped to shreds by some predator anyway, so what difference does it make? I really think that the PEDA people's ulterior motive is to rid the world of all animals, because the more they protest the more inclined everyone else is to buy the fur coats and shoot the antelopes just to spite them. Either they're really dumb or using some genius form of reverse psycology.

I have a typing handicap.

I just cut my finger on a RAZOR SHARP crabshell, and it is now bleeding profusely despite the band-aid I applied. Good thing it's not requiring of stitches because a) the idea of my skin being resewn together kind of makes me wheezy and b) I would hate to go into the ER and have to explain to about 30 people that the reason for my stitches was a stupid dead crab appendage.

I leave you all with this question, and I want honest answers:

Has anyone ever actually played Mousetrap, and by "play" I mean NOT just set up the mousetrap and make it trap mice? I'm interested, because as far as I know, nobody, including myself, has any clue how the game is "really" played. I don't know, setting up the trap was always game enough for me.

Take note.

For those of you who are unaware of the new channel arrangement, let me just assure you that you will still be able to catch your favorite television show, LHS Out of the Blue, on CHANNEL 9. That's right people, we are now basically TNT. We're moving on up, now our wonderful station will appear earlier in the channel surfing rotation. I really am very excited about this.

Raisin bran muffins are absolutely wonderful.

So are boiled hot dogs.

School's already exasperating.

I came back from today's Adventure In Babysitting to find *gasp* my school schedule lying on my counter. My brother told me that Samm had dropped it off, she was kind enough to pick it up for me while she was at LHS this morning! So I was excited to get this, and see if I got gym waivered and whatnot. Well, I read it and became so exasperated, the school was kind enough to give me classes that I have no desire to take!

Phys Ed., Senior: Mr. Vaillette---Okay, first of all I'm supposed to have gym waivered. Second of all, Mr. Vaillette is a creepy creepy man. There is no way I will stand for this.

Computer Apps 1: Mrs. Raymond---Why oh why don't all of my hours in a TV studio working on imovie count as applying myself to computers??

(Here's the real treat) Psychology: Mrs. Maynard---I expressed absolutely no interest in this class whatsoever. Why would I want to take both regular and AP Psych?? Especially since this full year course block is SUPPOSED to be reserved for Advanced TV Out of the Blue full year, so that I can take Morning Announcements full year. Oh the INCOMPETENCE!!

The rest of my classes, Advanced Math, Physics, AP Psych, AP Lit. amd Advanced TVs Out of the Blue and Announcements were all requested. However, my schedule is topped off with A STUDY. Why would I want to take a study when I need an english elective, i.e. SPEECH to graduate? What good will a study do for me?!

I'm making a godforsaken guidance appointment as soon as I wake up on August 11th, because something needs to be done about this. And if I don't get gym waivered, AP Bio here I come, I will not be subjected to useless sports playing under any circumstance.

Anyway. Last night Lizzy came back, we got some much needed ice cream and settled down to watch the Real World, which unfortunately was replaced with an Osbournes marathon. It's okay though, because thanks to this marathon we decided on our fallback career.

Are you all familiar with Tony, Ozzy's "chauffeur"? I put that in quotes because Tony does a lot more eating of the Osbourne's food and spending of the Osbourne's money than he does actual chauffering. We decided he is a celebrity leech, and if we can't achieve stardom ourselves, the next best thing is to mooch off of someone else's fame. All Tony has to do to keep his job is act as an interprateur for Ozzy, because the average American ear can barely understand a strong English accent, never mind one slurred with years of drug abuse, drive Ozzy around, and laugh at Ozzy's jokes, because nobody else does, because Tony's the only one who understands them.

Hopefully I'll be a news anchor on NBC so that I can hire my own leech. 

For those of you who watched Road Rules on Monday, you probably know what I'm about to say. Not only did Donell stay, but they replaced Cara with his female counterpart for Lord's sake. They might as well rename the show Road Rules: The Ghetto, because that's what it's turnd into. Argh.

Goals as of Now:

-Set my schedule straight for Ford's sake.
-Be on the Real World.
-Hire/Become a celebrity leech.
-Finish reading White Jacket so I can start not reading Barnaby Rudge.